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How to check up on the welfare of senior citizens without feeling invasive?

Checking up on someone to know his or her progress and wellbeing is usually considered a wonderful thing by the individual. In fact, most seniors appreciate it when their children, grandchildren, other relatives, and friends check up on them. Trying to know how one is doing shows that you not only care about him or her, but you are also thinking of them.

Though seniors may enjoy you calling in person or on the phone to know about their wellbeing, some might feel like you are invading their personal space, especially if you do it with a tremendous amount of frequency.

Everyone likes his or her freedom and independence. So, how can you frequently check on your elderly loved ones without being invasive?


When an elderly loved one has undergone a challenging experience, do not ask direct questions because they may seem insensitive.

An example is if your grandparent has lost their close friend. Do not ask them questions like “so, what do you think about death?” Perhaps they do not want to talk about their experience.

To avoid seeming overbearing when checking in on a senior, ask them if they feel like talking about the experience. Respect their choice if they do not feel like sharing or opening up to you. If they do not mind opening up, then you can have a nice conversation and find out what they think and feel.


Following up on someone should be about how they are doing. So, practice patience and take time to listen. Do not visit or make a phone call only to make the conversation all about you.

Genuinely care about the elderly person and listen to them. Listen and observe how they respond, noting their facial expressions and gestures. Taking the time to listen to a senior portrays that you are polite and you truly care.

Showing genuine interest will make the conversation seem less invasive because the senior will trust you and feel comfortable about opening up to you.

Offer assistance

A great way to prevent seniors from feeling like you are invading their privacy is to offer some kind of assistance.

Has anyone ever called you to ask about something specific then said that they just wanted to know? How did you feel about it? Chances are that you felt like they were just nosy and wanted to know about your troubles.

What if they offered some kind of assistance or solution to the problem you were facing? The probability that you would have appreciated the call is very high. The same applies to elderly people.

Check up on a senior and offer help or a solution to what they may be going through. If they refuse your help, it is fine and you should respect their decision. What matters is that the elderly person knows that if they need anything, all they have to do is ask.

Follow up often

Follow up on the progress of the elderly loved one frequently. Calling or appearing out of nowhere to ask about details in a senior’s life is intrusive, and they may not be willing to share anything.

However, when you follow up frequently on their progress, you will develop a closer bond with the senior as well as familiarity, and they will not feel invaded each time you check in on them.

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